Her faith, which she took with her in Morocco, felt like an obligation. Until Assiya* attended the Alpha course in Rotterdam and came to know Jesus.
'Three years ago, I moved to Rotterdam to live with my husband. Rotterdam meant a new beginning for me. I grew up in an Amazigh family in Morocco. Life there was very different from here. Women had to stay at home and couldn't just go out alone. Everything revolved around family, tradition and religion. The men went to the mosque, especially on Fridays, but the women usually did their prayers at home - five times a day, as they should.
I felt emptiness. I tried to be good, to do everything God would want, but I felt nothing in return. No love, no response. When I lived in Rotterdam, a flyer from the Alpha course fell through the door one day. I kept that flyer. Something inside me said: go. My husband didn't want to, but I said, 'Those people aren't going to kill me, are they? I'll just go.' From then on, everything changed.
The people there were different. No one judged. They asked: 'How are you doing? What do you want to eat? Do you want something to drink?' They hugged me. I had never experienced that before. That warmth, that love... it touched me deeply. With them I felt truly human for the first time. No games, no gossip. Only care and sincere attention.
Through them, I came to know Jesus. A woman from the Alpha course was very important in that. She gave me a Bible, her heart, her time. She became everything to me - my mother, my sister, my friend. I have no family here, but she became my family. Through her love, she showed me who God really is.
When I finally told my family in Morocco that I had become a Christian, they were angry at first. But I am 35, I know what I feel and believe. Now we talk again. Sometimes I talk to my mother and sisters about faith. I pray for them. I hope they too may experience God's love as I do now.
'What I wish? That Dutch Christians continue to do what they do, but also join forces with Arab people. What I received, I grant others that too. Real love, attention, time. That's where God can be found.'
* Real name known to editors.